Monday, October 24, 2011

Pornonomy Reviews: Bubble Gum

Bubble Gum (1983)
aka The Siblings

Directed by:
Damon Christian

Starring:
Candy Cummings
Honey Wilder
Kelly Grant
Laurien Wilde
Blair Harris
Eric Edwards
Marc Wallice
Ray Wells

Bubble Gum clocks in at just over 60 minutes. I'm guessing the total production time - writing, filming, editing, and scoring - was about 75 minutes.

The story: Carla (Wilder) has been having a long term affair with Sid (Wells). Her husband, John (Edwards), hires a private investigator (Harris) who alerts him to the long-term affair. When their daughter Paula (Wilde) comes home with to tell her parents she's marrying Sid's son Sammy (Wallice), John decides to seduce Paula's friend Bubble Gum (Cummings) to get back at Carla.

Now, as you might have guessed from the "aka" up there, Sid is Paula's real father, meaning she's engaged to her half-brother. You'd think that this would be a shocking revelation at the climax of the film, but Carla actually tries to tell Sid that he's Paula's father in the film's second scene, but, unfortunately, since he already came, he's fallen asleep. ("Men!") Hilariously, not only does she not bother to wake him up, but she doesn't see fit to break the news to Paula after she announces that she and Sammy are engaged.

Oh, and also the maid, Darcy (Grant) - who is apparently dating the PI - knows but doesn't bother telling anyone. And then, the PI, after rushing to the house when he discovers that John isn't Paula's real father, decides that it's more important to have sex with the maid in the kitchen. Bear in mind everyone is home, so either the household is pretty fast and loose with the rules, or the maid isn't particularly concerned about keeping her job.

So finally John breaks the news to Paula at the dining room table, devastating her so she naturally runs upstairs to take a bubble bath.

Then DEUS EX MACHINA! Apparently Sid ISN'T Sammy's father (it may actually be John!) so...the wedding is back on. Or at least Sammy and Paula have (simulated) bubble bath sex set to a jaunty tune that would've been great for The Apple Dumpling Gang before abruptly cutting to a mournful piano tune playing under the rolling credits.

It's been awhile since I've hypothesized that a porn was fueled largely by cocaine, but I've got to wonder about this one. Interestingly here, though, it's the editor I suspect of being totally lit.

Editing aside, Bubble Gum didn't really do anything wrong, but it's one of those movies that, in retrospect, if I'd never seen it, I wouldn't have missed out on anything. C

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